I am never all of me
and sometimes I go slowly
knowing that a sound one sound
is following me from world
and that I die each time
before it reaches me
I did not understand that she was hiding her feelings under irony, that this is usually the last refuge of modest and chaste-souled people when the privacy of their soul is coursely and intrusively invaded, and that their pride makes them refuse to surrender till the last moment and shrink from giving expression to their feelings before you.
Fiction is a branch of neurology: the scenarios of nerve and blood vessels are the written mythologies of memory and desire.
“My whole life I was motivated by jealousy”, Parajanov once said, “I used to be jealous of beautiful people – and became charming, I was jealous of smart people and became unpredictable.” Some say, he might have been jealous of talented people – and became a genius.
There’s not much information about the movie, except that it will be directed by Armenian-French director Serge Avedikian. Serge won Best Short at Cannes in 2010 for his film, “Chienne D’Histoire” (“Barking Island”), an allegory of the Armenian Genocide.
But it makes an immigrant laugh to hear the fears of the nationalist, scared of infection, penetration, miscegenation, when this is small fry, peanuts, compared to what the immigrant fears - dissolution, disappearance.
Believe me, every heart has its secret sorrows, which the world knows not, and oftentimes we call a man cold, when he is only sad.
Whatever we say
we know there is another
language under this one
Aesthetic pleasure arises from the perceiving of inarticulate forms.
Even in Goethe we come across heavy lines, even in him we can be confronted by lack of clarity or banality of thought. It is not a question of thought, or of colour, or of faithfulness to literary rules; it is something else, living but incomprehensible, something that will always elude any definition of artistic genius…the clearest of images of the great artists and their words are never clear to the end, rather as the limpid sky over our heads, when we gaze into it, turns out to be not pale blue at all, but a darker shade, deeper, fathomless. And so the works of great genius, for all their crystalline clarity, will sometimes make us gaze apprehensively into their depths, and define the clarity as the clarity of the deep…and that is all; what lies at the bottom of those depths eludes us.
Andrey Bely, The Tragedy of Art, ‘Dostoievsky and Tolstoy’.
A quote featured in Andrey Tarkovsky’s diary entry, November 10, 1980.
from Time Within Time: The Diaries, Andrey Tarkovsky.
The passages highlighted by my father (years ago) in particular are intriguing to me.
To burn and keep quiet about it is the greatest punishment we can bring on ourselves. It only served to bring the fire down on me! You think that time heals and walls hide things, but it isn’t true, it isn’t true! When things get that deep inside you there isn’t anybody can change them.
Let’s get one thing out of the way: Mexican immigration is an oxymoron. Mexicans are indigenous. So, in a strange way, I’m pleased that the racist folks of Arizona have officially declared, in banning me alongside Urrea, Baca, and Castillo, that their anti-immigration laws are also anti-Indian. I’m also strangely pleased that the folks of Arizona have officially announced their fear of an educated underclass. You give those brown kids some books about brown folks and what happens? Those brown kids change the world. In the effort to vanish our books, Arizona has actually given them enormous power. Arizona has made our books sacred documents now.
Loneliness does not come from having no people around one, but from being unable to communicate the things that seem important to oneself, or from holding certain views which others find inadmissible.